Rethinking heartbreak

I felt the cool hand across my face, I still remember your love. The warm scent of your thigh. This room is cold without you. But that is all just in my head, summer is coming and if I step outside I would feel the warm hot air brushing against my skin as you once did with your love. I smile, and see you smiling back at me. Love is gone, your love is gone from here and from me.

The tortured heart of lovers memory . I remember more of you over a longer period of time than we spent together or I remembered while you were there. I have forgotten all the things I was thinking about while we are together and mind mind only focuses on you, and every little thing that you did. This feeling is so real to me and runs so deep. I hear about hearbreak all the time, but it on a whole other level when it happens to you. I just want you back. Or I just want you here, so I don’t have to think about you all day every day. What went wrong, why can’t I stop theses things. Taking a defeatist approach I look around the room. I want to carve your name into my arm, so that I can see it is not just in my head. Release the blood and a little bit of you at a time.

It is like I have to sit though the entire relationship and 1/4th of the speed in which we dated. Before we met I was happy doing the things I was doing, excited in my own self freedom. But is that just denial that I needed love, or open to myself and open to the idea of love. Either way you found your way to me. It is such a weird feeling to be loved, it is like something opens up and hear, hear I am and here you are. That happy start that meant so much to me, opened my eyes to the world just a little. And although it hurts now, I would like to say thankyou for sharing love with me.

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