I have a problem

The first step would be admitting to myself that I have a problem,

As I find it so very consuming, so how do I deal with it knowing what I know?

Addicted to affection, love of every form,

You may think eyy thats not bad, but I disagree,

Take it away, and this junky can’t last long,

Give me it now, I’ll say anything,

I need a fix. Should I stop myself?

I say push deeper into this hurtful wound,

Let it bleed out, it will heal faster,

All wounds of the head do, if you push deeper.

we have liftoff

On the second round and I feel it in my head,

I want to know if its only said,

The gas tanks shot wondering if i’ll make it or not,

2 hour drive, just to get on top,

Alone in the dark, to scared to fart,

Head the sound, build it up in my head,

Not to night, I want to sleep damn right

5 minutes

When self love becomes a good thing.

Going longer, keeping the feeling stronger,

I stretch my legs and feel the stretch opening up my body,

As I feel waves of love fill me, so much so I can’t brealy control,

I take a breather,

Self love lasting longer.

In the mood to learn

That overpowering sadness I felt yesterday, rendering me unable to do any homework, and now I am happy and excited to be involeved in my studies?

Why are these feelings so overpowering?

What drives them?

How can I make them work in my favour?

How can I know when they are coming and going?

 

Even though I cannot prevent last minute homework excitement, doing a little each day can make it less dire! J

I am overwhelemed and interested in everything, could this have something to do with my squats and masturabing? Could it be limiting my social media time? Could it be going out to see comedy last night and being social? Could it be that I feel refreshed?

Or is it just that I have wild mood swings that can last days….

avoiding social media

That feeling I get when all I can do is done, and I realise I am sitting on my own

Understanding the paladies, Breaking of the dawn,For all the families of the light, i’ll be here tonight,

Fresh blood, warm hugs gives me a glowing light inside me,

But when it dims, I don’t know how far I will have travelled, can I find my way back,

Dragging this heavy heart.

Looking for new fresh blood ,

We are but vamipes in the night, swapping what little blood we have